I Will Not Say Goodbye
by LPfan4ever
Summary: After a tragic accident Peyton finds herself dealing with the fallout alone. How does she handle the tragedy around her? Can she move on without Lucas? LP
1. Prologue

**Hey guys! This is just a short story that started out as a One Shot but I wanted to add a prologue and epilogue. Basically Peyton finds herself alone after a tragic accident. I think the rest will be explained in the story. Hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think...**

Prologue

Peyton Sawyer-Scott is sitting on her bed watching her husband Lucas pack his suite case to go out of town on business. "Don't go Lucas stay here. I have a bad feeling about this trip." She says quietly.

Lucas looks at her "Peyton honey I have to go, if I don't this new book won't be published. Everything will be just fine and I'll only be gone for four days tops maybe not even that long. It'll be fine."

Peyton stares at him "But Lucas this weekend is Jamie's birthday party are you really going to miss that?" she asks.

Lucas runs his hands through his hair and sighs "Peyt I will try to be back by Saturday but this is important to me and you know that." He says slightly frustrated.

Peyton rolls her eyes "Fine!"

Lucas just shakes his head and finishes packing to leave. Once he's finished he closes the suite case and sits it on the floor. "Peyton what's really going on in that head or yours?" he asks coming to sit beside her on the bed.

Peyton looks up at him with tears in her eyes "I'm afraid of being alone Luke, I'm afraid that something is going to happen to you. I have this sinking feeling in my stomach that this isn't goodbye for a few days but goodbye forever."

Lucas pulls her into his arms and holds her for a few minutes. Finally they hear a car pull up and honk "I've got to go Peyton my cab is here."

She looks at him and nods sadly.

He gets up and grabs his suite case, when he gets to the door he stops. He sits the suite case down and walks back to where Peyton is sitting. "I will always be with you Peyton. I love you always remember that." He says wrapping his arms around her.

Tears fall down her face as she softly says "I love you too Lucas."

Three hours later Peyton is sitting talking to Brooke about Jamie's party and what they each got him.

"Well I started a tradition two years ago that I just write him a check for his birthday." Brooke says laughing.

Peyton laughs "Well we got him…" she gets interrupted by the phone ringing "Sorry hold on a second." She says reaching for the phone "Hello?" she says. She listens to the other person for a minute "Yes this is Peyton Scott." She answers. She listens for another few seconds before dropping the phone to the ground.

Brooke sees the terror in Peyton's eyes "Peyton what's wrong?" she asks.

Peyton just stares at her in terror for several minutes "The plane, oh God, the plane." Is all she is able to get out before collapsing to the ground.


	2. I Will Not Say Goodbye

**Ok here is teh main story! Please let me know what you think...It is just a short idea I got while listening to the song by Danny Gokey.**

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own One Tree Hill, the characters or the song "I Will Not Say Goodbye" by Danny Gokey. Everything belongs to their original writers.**

**I Will Not Say Goodbye**

_Sometimes the road just ends_

_It changes everything you've been_

_And all that's left to be_

Peyton Sawyer-Scott stood surrounded by family and friends as she listened to the words that the pastor was saying. Her eyes never leaving the casket that held the man she loved more than life itself inside of it. Tears filled her eyes as the pastor closed the bible and bowed his head to pray, she thought of the last words that he spoke to her.

"_I will always be with you Peyton. I love you always remember that." He said to her just before leaves for the airport to go out of town on business._

Before she knew it, it was time to leave the graveyard and start her life without him. She stands up and walks to the casket placing a rose on top before moving towards the limo. Everyone tries to offer her condolences but she doesn't hear them really. Just nods her head in recognition.

_Is empty, broken, lonely, hopin'_

_I'm supposed to be strong_

_I'm supposed to find a way to carry on_

Nathan walks up beside and puts his arm around her "I know you miss him Sawyer we all do. I promise with time it will get easier and you know that you always have Hales and I to lean on as well as Brooke and Julian." She just looks up at him and nods sadly.

Peyton walks into the empty house and suddenly it's as if the weight of the world has crashed down upon her. As soon as she shuts the door behind her she slumps down against it sobs shaking her body. "Why did you have to leave me?" she screams out between sobs.

After several long minutes she finally begins to pull herself together enough to make it to the bedroom where she falls sadly to the bed pulling his pillow into her arms, sobbing quietly as her tears fall around her.

_I don't wanna feel better_

_I don't wanna not remember_

_I will always see your face_

_In the shadows of this haunted place_

As she begins to fall asleep she think she feels a hand brush her hair back away from her face causing her to jerk her eyes open. When she does she is shocked at what she sees. "This isn't possible. It can't be you're, you're oh God this isn't real." She says closing her eyes thinking the person would disappear.

"Open your eyes Peyton I'm right here." The familiar voice says.

She shakes her head without opening her eyes "No I must be dreaming, you can't really be here." She says as the tears fall from her eyes.

She feels that familiar touch take hold of her face "Peyton please open your eyes and talk to me. I am real and I am here, I know you don't understand but please just talk to me. I'm here to help you cope with this."

_I will laugh_

_I will cry_

_Shake my fist at the sky_

_But I will not say goodbye_

She finally opens her green eyes and when she does she finds herself staring into his piercing blue ones "How is this possible Lucas? You were on that plane when it crashed they said there was no survivors. I buried you today." She says sobs again wracking her body.

He pulls her to him and tries to comfort her "Shh honey I know, I know. I was on that plane and you did bury me today. I just had to come back one last time to say goodbye."

She jerks away shaking her head "I'm not ready to say goodbye to you yet, I can't do this without you Lucas. I need you please come back to me please I need you, I'm not strong enough for this Luke." She begs tears streaming down her face.

_They keep saying time will heal_

_But the pain just gets more real_

_The sun comes up each day_

_Finds me waiting, fading, hating, praying_

He shakes his head "I'm sorry honey this is the way it has to be and we can't change that. But I'm here now so why don't we use this time to tell one another how much we love each other?"

She looks up at him with her tear stained face, visibly shattered. "I don't want to live without you Lucas our life together has only begun. We haven't even been married a year yet and this just can't be happening." Tears fall freely onto her shoulders.

Lucas sighs taking his hand and gently wiping them away from her eyes "I know and I'm sorry." He says quietly.

Peyton begins to get angry "You should have listened to me Lucas, I didn't want you to get on that plane in the first place but you said you had to. Why didn't you listen to me? If you would have listened you would still be here." She screams at him.

_If I can keep on holding on_

_Maybe I can keep my heart from knowing that you're gone_

_And I don't wanna feel better_

_I don't wanna not remember_

He just sadly nods his head "I know Peyt I know, I'm so sorry." He replies.

"No...you don't know" Peyton said shaking her head sadly as the tears pool. "You're not the one facing our friend's sympathetic faces and having your heart breaking every time you hear your name or find something of yours in the house we shared. I just...I don't know what to do without you. I need you to be with me and you're not. I miss your arms being wrapped around me and there's nothing you can do to fix it. What am I supposed to do when it feels as if I am walking around in an empty shell?" Peyton asked harshly brushing the tears from her cheeks.

_I will always see your face_

_In the shadows of this haunted place_

_I will laugh, I will cry, shake my fist at the sky_

_But I will not say goodbye_

"Peyton, I love you and now that I'm gone it's not going to be long before another guy falls in love with you and then I will have to watch that. I will have to watch you move on with your life and get over me. I don't know how I will be able to do that, but I know that I can't spend one minute without watching over you and making sure your safe." He says sadly.

Peyton stares at him for a minute trying to gather all of the thoughts running through her mind. She never thought about what this would do to him having to watch her from beyond move on with her life. "I guess this isn't easy for either of us is it?" she asks.

Lucas shakes his head "No it isn't. I have to look down on you and watch you move on with your life and fall in love with someone else. I'll have to watch you have a family with another man knowing that if things were different that would be me."

_I will curse, I will pray, I will re-live everyday_

_I will show through the blame_

_I'll shout out your name_

Peyton drops her head "Lucas I don't think I'll ever fall in love again. You are the love of my life and nobody will ever be able to compare to you." She says honestly.

Lucas sighs before pulling her to him "I want you to move on Peyton. I want you to live your life and have the family that we both wanted. You're too young to be alone and live your life alone. I don't want that for you." He tells her.

_I will laugh, I will cry, shake my fist at the sky_

_But I will not say_

"I can't have a family with anyone but you. I love you." She tells him honestly.

"Peyton, you are going to be a great mom and you deserve to have that. You will find love again, I know it." He whispers kissing her temple. "Now I think you should get some sleep, you've had a long day and I know you're exhausted."

She shakes her head "I don't want this to end and I know if I go to sleep when I wake up you'll be gone and I'll be alone again." She says crying.

He sighs "You will never be alone. Even if you don't see me I will always be with you." She looks at him with tears in her eyes. Sighing again "Fine but just lay back and let me hold you quietly for a while." He tells her pulling her to lie beside him with his arms around her.

Before long Peyton drifts off to sleep. Lucas looks down at her his heart heavy knowing that he has to do something neither of them want and leave her. He gently kisses her forehead "Remember that I will always be with you Peyton. I'm going to love you forever." He whispers.

_Will not say goodbye_

The next morning the sun shining through the window wakes Peyton up. She sits up suddenly realizing that Lucas is gone and her heart breaks all over again. Tears flood her eyes as she looks around the room she shared with her husband and the memories of their life together flash through her mind. Suddenly a calm sensation overtakes her and for once she doesn't feel so alone. She looks up towards Heaven "I love you Lucas, I always will." She whispers before getting up to get ready for the day. She knows she must go on with her life for Lucas.

_I will not say goodbye_

A few days later Peyton stares at the test in her hand not believing what she sees. She smiles tears falling down her face and dropping to the bathroom floor. "Thank you Lucas." She says laying her hand on her still flat stomach. "We will always love you." She whispers.

_I will not say... _

**Let me know what you think...Epilogue will be up shortly...**


	3. Epilogue

**Here is the epilogue...I hope you like it...I have to give a shout out to HJS-NS-23 for helping me with the main story. I forgot to thank her before now :-) Please review and let me know what you guys think. Your feedback helps me write better :-)**

Epilogue

_Ten months later…._

Peyton Sawyer-Scott makes her way through the stones until she reaches the one she's wanting. She looks down and tears well up in her eyes like they normally do when she visits him.

"Hi Luke." She says gently sitting down. She sighs looking down at the sleeping baby in her arms. "I'm sorry I haven't been by the last few months like I promised you I would be." She says as a tear falls from her welled up eyes.

She looks over at Keith's stone and tears begin flowing freely from her eyes. "I have somebody here I want you to meet Luke. This is the reason I haven't been here lately." She smiles thinking about telling everyone she was pregnant and their reactions.

_*Peyton walks into Nathan and Haley's house where Brooke is with them waiting for Peyton's big announcement. Nathan sees her first "So what's the big announcement?" he asks nervously. Everyone was afraid that once things became real to Peyton she would up and leave Tree Hill._

_Peyton smiles "Hold on Nate let me actually get in the house." She says with a laugh. Once she's in front of everyone she can see the nervous looks on their faces especially her best friend Brooke's. She glances at them all nervously as the tears flood her eyes "Well it looks like Lucas left me, well us all with a piece of him. Um…" she pauses and laughs nervously "I'm pregnant!" she blurts out._

_Brooke jumps up as does Haley and they both wrap their arms around her as they all begin to cry. "Oh my gosh this is amazing." Haley gushes._

_Nathan finally stands up and walks over to Peyton "I promise you Sawyer I will be here for this baby the way Keith was there for Lucas. You will have all of us supporting you 100%." He says reassuring her.*_

"I had a hard time picking out a name because everyone wanted to help but in the end I just waited until I saw the baby for the first time." She holds the baby up a little more "This is our son Sawyer Lucas Scott. His name came to me with help from Nathan." She thinks back to what made her pick her sons name.

_*Nathan was sitting beside Peyton's bed as she was in labor, Haley and Brooke had gone to get something to eat but they didn't want to leave Peyton alone so Nathan said he would stay. "You know Sawyer if this baby is a boy maybe you could name him Royal." He joked._

_Peyton looked at him and rolled her eyes "Yeah as much as I love you Nathan I don't think so. But why on earth do you still call me Sawyer? That isn't my last name anymore?" she asks slightly annoyed from being in labor._

_Nathan just laughs "Because I've always called you that and well I don't have anyone else to call Sawyer so you're stuck with it. Unless you name this baby Sawyer." He smiles.*_

"He didn't know it at the time Luke but he picked Sawyer's name and I think it fits perfectly. It also made Nathan happy he says he's the one who named his nephew. Jamie is also proud because he shares a middle name with his little cousin." She looks away trying to keep her composure.

"We all miss you Luke and it's so hard knowing Sawyer will never meet his daddy. But please know that we will all make sure he knows what a wonderful man his father was." Tears begin to fall again. "Well I should probably get going since it's a little chilly out here. Don't worry though we'll be back, I'm going to make sure we visit you as much as possible. I love you Lucas and I always will. You told me that day you visited me that I deserved a family and thanks to you I have one."

She notices the air is calm and there is no wind but yet there is a leaf falling, she watches it fall from the tree and land on Sawyer. She smiles up at the sky "I know you will always be watching over us. We love you always."


End file.
